Nggak bisa bilang.

Sebenernyaakusihbiasajawellenggakbiasaajasihtepatnyamencobabiasaajaakutaukamusibukyakanemangitukonsekuensiyakamuikutsegalamacemkegiatanjadinyakamusibukakunggakbatesinkamuakutaulahakusiapakangapantesbangetbatesinpilihanorangkanyaakutaubangetkokakuseharusnyadukungkamuakudukungkamujokseratuspersenmalahthat'swhatgirlfieissupposedtoberightdanperlukamutauakunggaknyesekataugalauatausegalamacemsebenernyaakucumakecewatapidikitkokdikiiiiiiitbangetakubukankecewagaragarakamusibuktapiwaktuakunyobabuatdukungkamunyemangatinkamutapikamunyagituakugppakoktapijangansalahinakukalauiniberubahjaditerlalubiasa ;)

abcdefghijklmnopqrstUvwxyz.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Aku udah teriak. Tolong, sebentar aja, dengerin.

***

I don't exactly hate you, girl. But if you were on fire, and I had water, I'd drink it.

Hi.

I'm hiding, do you realize?

#factsaboutme

I am a morning person. I am a perfectionist. I am an only child. I am currently in my PJs. I am currently pregnant. I am currently suffering from a broken heart. I am left handed. I am married. I am addicted to MySpace. I’m shy around the opposite sex. I bite my nails. I currently regret something I have done. When I get mad I curse. I don’t like anyone. I enjoy rock music. I enjoy RNB and pop. I enjoy jazz music. I have a car. I have a cell phone. I have a pet. I have at least one brother or sister. I have been to another country. I have been told that I’m smart. I have been told that I have an unusual sense of humor. I have had a broken bone. I have caller ID on my phone. I have changed a lot over the past year. I have had surgery. I have killed another person. I have had my hair cut within the last week. I have had the cops called on me. I have kissed someone I knew I shouldn’t. I have mood swings. I have rejected someone before. I have seen the Lord of the Rings trilogy. I have watched Sex and the City. I like Shakespeare. I love to cook. I love Michael Jackson. I love sleeping. I love to shop. I miss someone right now. I own over 100 CDs. I own over 100 DVDs. I own and use a library card. I practice a religion that is not considered mainstream. I read books for pleasure in my spare time. I sleep a lot during the day. I strongly dislike math. I think Britney Spears is pretty. I will try ALMOST anything once. I work at a job that I enjoy. I would classify myself as ghetto. I can name all seven dwarfs from Snow White. I am currently wearing socks. I am tired. I am currently waiting for someone. I lost contact with someone. I hate Miley Cyrus. I think Party In The USA is catchy. I’d date Harry Potter. I can name all the past presidents of the United States. I know who was president before George Bush. I love pickles. I need the internet to live. I prefer vanilla over chocolate. I watched Star Trek. I watched all six movies of Star Wars. I own an Xbox. I think music is life. I prefer bands than singers.

:(

I'm in a jealous.  Idk why, like there's something wrong in my head and my heart. You hurt me, not. but it still makes....argh I can't explain it. sorry for being a sensitive person.

YOU DID IT AGAIN!

i just have a simple wish

kamu yang dulu, tolong pergi dari pikiranku

sesimpel itu kok, will you? :)))))

D

sometimes, i doubt

and wondering why,

everything seems perfect

but not inside.

such as imperfect life. sigh

mkbp

holla faery, comment allez-vous?

senin kemaren seru banget deh. gue maen mkbp sama fae. tau mkbp? mkbp itu singkatan dari misal kita belom pacaran. jadi itu game balik ke masa pdkt dulu gitu hahaha biasa kita emang lagi ga ada kerjaan. btw, itu ide dari gue, tapi di post duluan sama si harits -____- dia sama cewenya, pita ikutan main mkbp gitu.gue maen sama fae lewat sms, 

ps. warna ungu itu fae. warna pink gue.
 

halo, niela ya? :)

iyaa, siapa?

ojek, anak kelas sebelah hwehe :p

#ojek itu nama panggilan si fae, haha emang aneh

oala, ojek yg dulu X4 itu tah?

heem hafal banget haha. 

mw tanya, anak ipa 8 matematikanya diajar sapa ya?

soalnya aku agak-agak lupa gitu kamu yang mana hehe

pak fathoni, km?

mentang-mentang dari X10 :p 

sama, thanks ya :3

emang kenapa sama X10? yer welcome :)

unggul, haha :)) ganggu ga nih?

sama aja -__- engga, kenapa?

coba aku daftar aksel, pasti masuk :p wkwk

smsan yok haha mau ga ?

#gue udah pengen ketawa aja, masa dia langsung ngajakin smsan hahaha

somboong -__- haha boleh

bercanda nells :D lagi apa emang? :)

kok ga daftar loh? lagi baca novel, km?

ga ada duit haha :p ga papa, lagian aksel ga bagus-bagus amat

lagi gitaran, masi sama joni ta?

#joni itu nama mantan gue- nama disamarkan

perasaan bagus deh, ada ACnya haha . udah enggak jek :(

ga enak ga bisa merasakan masa SMA penuh cinta ya ga :)

lho iya ta? sejak kapan?

#si fae sih pura-pura doang, kalo belom tau gue udah putus mana berani dia sms :p

perasaan banyak sakit hatinya deh. udah lama, 5 bulanan yang lalu jek

iya sih, tapi masih banyak cintanya wek :p wah turut berduka cita :( 

sama sapa sekarang?

jomblo kok haha, kenapa? mau daftar? hahaha xD

wah gimana ya? haha masih dibuka ta pendaftarannya? :p

udah enggak jee wkwk :p

#o oh, gue ga sengaja bilang jee, itu panggilan gue buat fae

kayaknya gue kalah deh hahaha

uda ngantuk ta nells? :) 

yaaah :( #mewek hahaha

iya dikit, kamu ? haha dimarahin cewemu ntar

masi maen rubik, bobo aja loh nak :p 

haha cewe apaan? ga punyaak :)

oh iya sih, kamu kan masternya rubik :p
haha senasib deh :p

sotoy ah :p baca novel ga bikin ngantuk ta? 

jangan GR aku mau pdkt loh ya haha :D

gue ketawa mulu hahahaha. akhirnya gue sms dia, udahan maennya. masa dia tuh pdktnya langsung gitu. mana gue kalah lagi gara-gara ga sengaja manggil dia jee. dia bilang kalo gue ga profesional maennya. ah sial awas kamu tunggu pembalasanku :p

yah gini ini kita. katanya temen-temen gue pasangan yang aneh. hahaha. pokoknya yang lagi pacaran, harus cobain game buatan gue, mkbp dijamin seru abis :p wkwk

i'm madly in love with you♥

aaaaargh

tears. tears. tears.
yah hari ini gue nangis mulu. di rumah, di sekolah. sorry faery, gue nggak bisa cerita di sini, pokoknya masalah keluarga lah. big really big problem. gue capek tau. capek nangis. capek mikir. aargh.
gue bodoh banget, seharusnya gue nggak boleh egois. gue setuju kok, tapi ini loh hati aku masih nyesek. berat banget. yah, gue rasa gue perlu waktu buat belajar ngerti, belajar nerima semua.

I gotta go my own way

inspired by high school musical 2
i heart this song so damn much

troy        : what about us? what about everything we've been through?
gabriella : what about trust?
troy        : you know I never wanted to hurt you
gabriella : and what about me?
troy        : what am I supposed to do?
gabriella  : I gotta leave but I'll miss you
troy        : I'll miss you
gabriella  : so, I've got to move on and be who I am
troy        : why do you have to go?
gabriella : I just don't belong here, I hope you understand
troy        : I'm trying to understand
gabriella : we might find our place in this world someday, but at least for now
troy       : I want you to stay
gabriella : I gotta go my own way

ngehayal

khayalan gue  yang pertama
suatu malam di salah satu kafe favorit gue dan dia

gue   : ehem

dia    : ehem juga (nyengir)

gue   : gue pengen nanya deh

dia    : nanya apa nells ?

gue   : apa sih alasan yang buat lo sayang sama gue?

dia    : (senyum)

gue   : (jantung gue rontok)
dia    : kenapa nanya gitu? masih belum yakin?
gue   : enggak, gue pengen tau aja, apa sih alasan lo...

dia    : bahkan gue nggak butuh alasan apapun buat sayang sama lo :)

cuma satu kalimat tapi bener-bener dalem maknanya
nggak perlu nyebutin cantik,pinter,baek, dan segala macam alasan klise lainnya
itu jawaban yang cukup untuk segala-galanya

khayalan gue yang kedua

gue   : heran deh, gue kan nggak terkenal, nggak gahul, nggak cantik

dia    : bukan karena cantik aku menyayangimu. tapi karena aku menyayangimulah, kaulah yang tercantik bagiku :)

gue   : (gue butuh operasi jantung)

buat orang yang lagi jatuh cinta, segi fisik nggak lagi penting
baginya, ceweknyalah yang tercantik cowoknyalah yang tertampan, dan segalanya mengabur, yang terlihat jelas hanyalah dia, pasangannya :)