Do you?

'I don't want to lose you'

 His voice almost a whisper. Seeing his haggard expression, she took his hand and squeezed it, then reluctantly let it go. She could feel the tears again, and she fought them back. 

'But you don't want to keep me, either, do you?'

 To that, he had no response.

-Dear John

Karena saya mengetahui, apa yg tidak sanggup saya miliki.

Aku mulai berkisah, tentang satu sahabatku yang lahir di negeri orang lalu menjlani kehidupan keluarga imigran yang sederhana. Setiap kali ibunya hendak menghidangkan daging ayam sebagai lauk, ibunya pergi ke pasar untuk membeli bagian punggungnya saja. hanya itu yang ibunya mampu beli. Sahabatku pun beranjak besar tanpa tahu bahwa ayam memiliki bagian lain selain punggung. Ia tidak tahu ada paha. dada atau sayap. Punggung menjadi satu-satunya definisi yang ia punya tentang ayam.

Aku menghela napas. Kisah ini terasa semakin berat membebani lidah. Aku sampai di bagian bahwa aku telah jatuh cinta. Namun orang itu hanya mampu kugapai sebatas punggungnya saja. Seseorang yang hanya sanggup kuhayati bayangannya dan tak pernah kumiliki keutuhannya. Seseorang yang hadir sekelebat bagi bintang jatuh yang lenyap keluar sebelum tangan ini sanggup menggapai. Seseorang yang hanya bisa kukirimi isyarat sehalus udara, langit, awan atau hujan. Seseorang yang selamanya harus dibiarkan berupa sebentuk punggung karena kalau sampai ia berbalik niscaya hatiku hangus oleh cinta dan siksa.

"Sahabat saya adalah orang yang berbahagia. Ia menikmati punggung ayam tanpa tahu ada bagian lain. Ia hanya mengetahui apa yang ia sanggup miliki. Saya adalah orang yang paling bersedih, karena saya mengetahui apa yang tidak sanggup saya miliki"

Taken from Hanya Isyarat, Rectoverso.

UYEH!

Morning sweetheart. How's your holiday? Awesome I guess, Well, a week ahead  will be not too typical. There are full exercise for preparing PMR competition. And I have to practice a full week! Oh, no complaint -_-

I have nothing to do for today, maybe reading Breaking Dawn (for the umpteenth times). Ssst, I'm addicted to Jacob Black, he's totally HOT :p

I 'm considering to watching some DVD, but I'm too lazy to go out and rent it. Still, I hope I can read some new-novels so badly bad. Here novels that I want to dying for :

1. The Book of Lost Things

2. Eragon Series

Anyone, please buy these for me :(

HIPHAP!

I've finished Rectoverso and ohmy it's a GREAT book, truly. Dee is genius, and you must read it! Well,  I know, it's too late, yea Rectoverso is a old book and I just read it now. Poor me -_-

Anw, my favorite story is Cicak di Dinding, Malaikat Juga Tahu and Back to Heaven's Light. An unexpected ending successfully make me falling in love with them.

And my favorite part in Back to Heaven's Light

There's no one to blame. There's nothing to blame. There shouldn't even be a need to question. He had his choices, and I had mine. We all have our freedom to decide. We all have our preference to experience. I've forgiven him for leaving, I've forgiven myself for staying, and I forgiven life for creating this drama of birth and death.

I almost cried when reading it. Awesome.

Btw, I can't wait for tomorrrow, haphap tomorrow will be a wkwk day for agen neptunus :p

zombiesweek

hellaw faeries. how's your day? well, i think that's worst week ever. i'm so tired of the drama. just like everything becomes yuck -_-

mungkin gara-gara ini minggu pertama sekolah setelah libur semester, christmas and new year eve. my brain is still frozen. ngga bisa dibuat mikir zzz. tau ngga? berasa aku kayak zombi di kelas, jadi kalo diajakin ngomong sering ngga nyambung, sering nggombal (ini ketularan si awti -_-), tambah ga jelas parah deh. pengennya tuh tidur mulu di kelas.

malah nih, tadi kan ada pelajaran olahraga. terus disuruh jalan-jalan. iya, jadi kita dikasih rute, terus disuruh nggambar rutenya sama nyari tanaman toga. penting banget -_- 

dan rutenya? gila sumpah gue nggak bohong nih, rutenya tuh ya puuuuanjaaaaaaang banget. masa kita harus jalan, panas-panas dari sekolah ke pasar senggol terus ke kartini habis itu ke panglima sudirman dan akhirnya balik lagi ke smansa, nah lo, gila banget kan? buat yang ngga ngerti, pokoknya tuh rute sepanjang-panjangnya panjang deh #lebe

but, i have a great news. les aku dikurangi satu, yeaaaah. anyway, i've already finished my new book, grey sunflower. that's a great book. and i found this one :

rasa sayangku seperti bunga matahari

kuat, kokoh dan tidak berduri

ps. i miss you quite terribly, agen neptunus 2.

how sweet you are

hello faeries. it's been a while since i'm not posting anything here. i miss you soooo maach, truly.

well, i've already finished 3 books for a month. there are shiver, filosofi kopi and firebelly. and bad, my daddy won't buying new novels for me -_- soooo here i'm, jobless. so i decide to give you some-romantic-quotes-i've-ever-read from some books.

terkadang, cinta berarti melepaskan justru pada saat kau ingin menggenggam lebih erat

-ink exchange

seolah selama ini aku mengira diriku sudah lengkap, tapi sam menunjukkan bahwa aku adalah puzzle

dia memecah diriku jadi berkeping-keping dan menyatukanku lagi

-shiver

hati kamu mungkin memilihku, seperti hatiku selalu memilihmu

tapi hati bisa bertumbuh dan bertahan dengan pilihan lain

kadang, begitu saja sudah cukup

sekarang pun aku merasa cukup.

-perahu kertas

"tak tahukah kau betapa pentingnya kau bagiku? kau tak punya bayangan sama sekali betapa aku sangat mencintaimu?" bisik edward

"aku tau betapa aku sangat mencintaimu" jawab bella

"kau membandingkan sebatang pohon kecil dengan seluruh isi hutan"

-eclipse

oh how sweet you, edward. if i were bella, i'll be luckiest girl around the world. can't you see that i love you so fuckin much? come on edward, leave her for me -_-'

sugar queen

morn' faeries. i have nothing to do. so i decided to give you review a book.

Sugar Queen by Sarah Addison Allen. this is one of my favorites book. kinda romantic and unpredictable. at first, i'm not too interested with the cover. ya, i think it's usual. but i changed my mind when i saw the reviews, New York Times Bestselling Author, Winner Best Women's Fiction, Romantic Times Reviewers Choice Award. wow, that's so great. so i asked my dad to buy this one.

Sugar Queen follows the story of Josey Cirrini and Chloe Finley, two very different women with two very different lives that fine themselves as friends due to many unlikely circumstances. watching the growth of these two women as they both develop into themselves was what had me turning the pages as quickly as i could.

Sarah, the writer has a way of making you invested her character. the story can't predictable and sweet. really, this one is so romantic.  her storytelling is like reading a grown up fairy tale and i love this book so much.

Sugar Queen is the perfect book to curl up with on a lazy afternoon. i found myself unable to stop turning the pages, and at one point getting angry that i couldn’t read any faster.  i wanted to get to the end of the story as quickly as i could. i highly recommend Sugar Queen for you who loves kinda romantic books.